it's all about the wordplay.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

HELLO HELLO ALL MY ADORING BLOG READERS! (: I have come to cure you of withdrawal symptoms of not reading my satirical humour for days, though suffering from withdrawal symptoms myself. I am, indeed, noble, am I not? (:

Oh yes, by the way, if you’re wondering why I’m typing in such properly capitalized language, that is because I am using MS word, in fear that a stupid computer screw up might rob me of my long blog post. (:

That aside, I AM SUFFERING FROM POST-MILO DEPRESSION! As is all of the other participants, anyway. I shall attempt to give you a blow-by-blow recount of the whole trip, as far as my limited memory span would take me. And yes, it is going to be a long blog post. Do, grab something to eat in the meantime won’t you.

DAY ONE
day one was a complete waste of time, actually. But it was the start of many uh, bee-you-ti-ful friendships, no?
the entire day was spent on 2 buses. One of which smelt really bad and we were glad to trade at Malaysia customs for a more comfortable one with no odour and a television! (: Basically the whole day we were holding our bladders and then stopping at a really dirty toilet where we’d either continue to hold our bladder or proceed to wash the toilet before using it. Yes, one must master the art of hover pissing when in Malaysia. Unless you’re a Malaysian of course, then you probably don’t need to, either that or you’re used to it already.
One thing I hate about Malaysia is the HEAT and the FLIES. Zomg you can just die of either of them when exposed to each for 10 minutes. But apart from that, the food is rather good, though not as hygienic as in Singapore. But clean food’s not that tasty anyway. I DON’T want to think why. Ignorance can be bliss sometimes. Anyway, Da Vinci Code was playing in the bus, but it was too soft I couldn’t really hear. And besides, I kind of forgot the story line so sound was really important. Geez. I am GOING TO sneak in man. ONE DAY. Anyway, the bus ride was jus really typical la. Shared a plate of rice with 2 fish and half a salted egg with Candice if I’m not wrong. Yes. I think that was how it was. The whole day was spent either eating or curling up in the bus seat listening to music. A blatant waste of time, I say.

After a long and arduous journey, we finally reached the hotel armada. The rooms were of a respectable size and the toilet was NICE (: basically, I was happy with everything about the room, except my ROOM-mate. No prizes for guessing why. You’ll get that in major detail later on anyway.

Went for the opening ceremony for the milo competition. It was a COMPLETE and ABSOLUTE waste of time. Basically we sat around for more than an hour just sloshing down many cups of diluted orange juice and playing stupid stupid games like hamburger and kfc. Hahaha. Such memories. I’ll never forget it man.
Anyway, after we got really fed up with sitting around for such a long while, we not-so-discreetly went off to eat dinner. Walked a really long while to some ulu mall where we ate at macdonalds. That was super climax lah.
Oh yes, I remember spending a really long time explaining to the macs person that I wanted a small porridge. The 3.20RM one.

Zomg. I am really damn random.

While walking back to the hotel I suddenly remembered that the sec 2s were alone! I am SUCH a caring senior right? And luckily I remembered lah, they were kind of… lost? Haha yeah. That was bad. Should never do that again.

Had the meeting and went back to bathe. Then when I was trying to sleep, my ROOMmate was making a lot of noise. NO PROZES FOR GUESSING what kind of noise. The kind that you make in your sleep. You know..

So I went over the linked room, which happened to be Jerryca’s, and luckily for me, Nicole went to study in another room, so I had the bed (:

DAY TWO
Woke up super SUPER early for breakfast. Couldn’t really see properly cause I didn’t put my contacts in and I stupidly forgot to bring my spectacles. What a screw-up.
The hotel food was not bad, I must say. Sat there eating for a long time before going up to bathe and prepare for my match, which I forgot what time it was.
Anyway, that day was the day of the first match. And I was super LUCKY to meet a seeded Japanese player la. GGXX. Got thrashed like crazy. Only managed to get 3 points off her and a lot of handouts. But never mind. She’s seeded. So whatever. And she’ SO CUTE OKAY! She asked me to take a picture with her! I know I totally look gross in the picture la but its COOL! (:
Cool right. International friendships. PWNZ J00 la. Yes you, talking to your teddy bear.

Can’t really remember what I spent doing the rest of the day. Hmm. I think I spent it in Jerryca’s room playing cards or something. That’s my short-term memory for you man.

If I’m not wrong, that was one of the 3 days I slept in my own room amidst the noise.

DAY THREE
Woke up at an extremely ungodly hour. Had the same breakfast and then went to Astaka courts for my game. Yes. The stupid girl that I was supposed to play very smartly ‘lost to me in the mental battle’ (as James hill might say) which in other words gave me a bloody walkover and made me wake up for nothing. Zomg. WHAT an idiot. But in any case, that meant I walked straight to the next round (:
AND the next round was that very same day, at 5 pm. Of course, went back to the hotel. Crapped around for a while, i think I ate honey stars or something but I can’t really remember so too bad if you’re really kaypoh about my boring life.
Yes, as I was saying. I returned to the courts once more that day. Worrying like crazy that I wouldn’t be able to win my opponent. Yes, given my talent in squash, which is pretty much non-existent, I sure have reason to worry.
As I said, my match was at 5. But at 6, my opponent was still nowhere to be seen, and the STUPID SCREWED UP MANAGEMENT didn’t do anything and they thought my match was over. NUMBSKULLS!

Only at 6.15 did they finally tell me that I have a walkover. Which is really dumb cause I could have gotten the walkover a whole hour earlier. Geez, really, the world will never run out of stupid people!

Waited for the rest of the people to be ready, then we went to Mid Valley I think. The initial plan was to watch a movie, but we spent so long in the freezing cold waiting for a bludy cab that we lost all our enthusiasm. Besides, not everyone was there. So we just went to eat and shop at mid valley.

The pet shop was cool man. But I still don’t understand who’d want a huge iguana as a pet. I’ll probably scare myself half to death if that creature was in my house. If you MUST know, I screamed when I rapped the glass and the reptile moved. And it’s HUGEEE.

Ate a humble dinner at the food court. One piece of advice for you. When in Malaysia, do NOT watch people when they’re preparing your food. Chances are, you’ll see something you shouldn’t and that’ll totally screw your appetite up. I know, cause I tried. So take it from me man.
Another piece of advice for you. Don’t offer others your food unless
1) You really really mean it
2) You’re sure the person will reject
3) You wont spend days whining about how that person stole your jelly.

HINT, MARK.

Yup went back to the hotel again. Played cards I think, in some room that I happen to have forgotten thanks to my selective memory.

OHOH RULES FOR PLAYING DAIDEE
1) patience is the way to win (jerryca)
2) DON’T HOLD BACK! (mark)
3) Don’t throw all your DEEs down at the same time
4) Don’t end with a small card
5) If you can’t win, aim not to be last (jerryca)
6) If you know you can’t win, disrupt the play (daryl)
7) Play to circumstance

Follow those rules, confirm win one. (:

And no, I don’t remember if I slept in my own room. Whoops! But you can’t really blame me, can you!

DAY FOUR
That day I made the stupidest mistake I ever did in my whole life. I stupidly read the wrong column for my match time and I thought it was at 5 pm.
And what time was it actually? 10.50
What time did I wake up? 10.30
GGXX. Susan called me and I nearly died of a heart attack man! I rushed like crap and reached Astaka 5 min before my stipulated match time. But the thing was, I wasn’t even awake. Yeah, so expectedly, I lost larh. But never mind I guess? We should uh, learn from our mistakes, shouldn’t we? (:
Anyway, I wouldn’t have won. The girl could do a split while playing squash. Am I supposed to be able to beat that?

Went back to the hotel to bathe and crap around after that. If I’m not wrong, we went to mid valley to watch x men 3! (: NICE MOVIE everyone should go watch it. But got a lot of gross gross kissing scenes and jean grey looks like EMILY ROSE wtf scary!

And we sat down dunno how long in the cinema after the show to watch the part after the credits. They said it was around ten minutes. THAT WAS A MYTH. It lasted 2 seconds, bloody hell! I suppose there’d were an x men 4 coming out. Haha. Hopefully the UCSC people have an outing or something, that’d be quite cool!

Went shopping after that. Was actually hoping to get a pair of decent shoes cause my once-trusty sandals happened to have failed me in a most untimely situation. DARN! I had to drag my feet wherever I went after that. So UNGLAM!

Spent the whole night playing daidee again. At least, that’s what I think happened. Hahaha. Sheesh, I’ve really bad memory!

DAY FIVE
got woken up by housekeeping, both unfortunately and fortunately. Otherwise I’d have been super super late!
All of us went to some dingy club to play squash among ourselves. The court was like crap and the only cool thing about it was that it could be moved to form a doubles court. JUST BUILD ONE ALREADY -.-
But the courts there really sucked la. I was doing my backhand shots. And given my innate talent which is yes, nonexistent, I hit the ball out and it got STUCK. THERE. UP THERE.
So Samuel suggested that I throw my shoe up there to get it down. Okay, so I did. And guess what?
MY SHOE GOT STUCK UP THERE AND THE BALL CAME DOWN! So I had to throw my other shoe up to get it down. Thankfully, it didn’t get stuck up there. But I reiterate my point. The courts suck.

That was a really boring day. We started playing daidee cause it was absolutely BORING.

Got really pist off with ROOMmate. She purposely did things to spite me hokay! How MEAN is that?!! Hoho, look who’s talking man :P

Apart from that, we went to the all 4 sides glass courts. Which was really cool, but a little bit inconvenient, cause you absolutely cannot hit the ball out, or you’d have to go search for the stupid ball.

The ITSSOCOOLING boy pissed me off and I couldn’t take it. But after that the whole day I was laughing at the ridiculous things he did. Haha. Okay that was random.

Again, spent the whole night playing daidee and polar bear. Whoa those 2 games are like OWNAGE la seriously. It’s just super fun to sabo people! And it think the UCSC people are really really funky. I mean, we can go without sleep for a really long time albeit getting screwed in the morning. But its cool anyway. We went out in the middle of the night to get a ramly burger and buy groceries. I swear that ramly burger is the tastiest thing you’d ever put in your mouth and everyone should go try it. Again, don’t look at what the guy does to your burger.

Shawn and I decided to be boliao and go to every single level of the hotel to walk around. Took us over an hour to complete the whole hotel. We realized that the painting are super repeated larh. They just put the painting there fore fun only. And the paintings weren’t even nice. All about ships and water one. No creativity! Then we went to Shawn’s room and put a blanket over Samuel to jack him. HAHAH (: should have seen his face in the morning man. Then Shawn came over to hear the noises that ROOMMIE made. Oops? =
All of us ended up squeezing into Mark’s room anyway. It was amazing how so many guys and girls can fit into one small room and still be reasonably comfortable.

DAY SIX
Went to some other dingy club to play friendlies with people. I played damn terribly la. Actually I couldn’t really be bothered. Darn, my match attitude is terrible, I should reflect!

Went to sit on a swing after that. Just realized it’s been quite a while since I last sat on a swing! Had a horrid lunch that I stupidly paid RM21 for! So jacked la. Should have eaten more ice cream or something.

After that went back to the hotel to bathe. Gave the finals a miss. After all, no one I knew was playing. So there was no point. We went out to Sunway Pyramid after that. It’s been a really really long time since I last skated so the experience was cool. It’s like I knew how to skate, but I didn’t know how to skate. Okay that didn’t make sense at all. Jerryca, Gabriel and Mabel learnt to skate that day and they were quite okay at it. Mabel Li was CHICKEN and sat it out! Haha! Fell down once, not because I was clumsy, but someone PUSHED me down and I was so pissed with the guy. Then I got so paranoid I screamed when anyone came too near. And another thing. ROOMIE WAS PRO. Like zomg. Surprise surprise!

After that, we went for dinner! Ate at Manhattan’s Fish Market! Couldn’t finish my food but had a super nice drink and I realize I’m giving unnecessary details and this is a very long sentence.

Went back to the hotel for the meeting. After the meeting, we went back to our own rooms and arranged to meet. Only that, there was one problem. ROOMIE was stationed at the 20th floor lift lobby in case we went to Mark’s room, and in case Mark came down. So she’d know where we were and she’d follow! SO SCHEMING RIGHT! But you can’t deny that’s quite a good strategy.

Went through a really long process before we ended up at….. Samuel’s room, then Susan’s room. Spent quite a while laughing at Jerryca’s screw up. (hoho rare, no?) before we started playing daidee again. And we found that ROOMIE went to play daidee with Shaun, Timothy and those people lah. Haha. Oh well, at least she fit right in (:

Watched white chicks, which Candice slept right through. Totally love that show man. And the uscs people are just so darn funny it just adds on to the fun

Ordered room service, which took a really really long time to come. But the food was good and we didn’t even drink much of the water anyway. Oops? (:

DAY SEVEN
Fell asleep only at around 6.30 and woke up at 10. amazing how I managed to stay awake for most of the day until we were reaching Singapore, then I pengsaned in the bus. Haha.
Checked out at 12.30 and took the bus to the adidas warehouse, bought 2 shirts and a nike jacket! (: and an ipod holder which was NICE! And CHEAP, not to mention (:

Played daidee on the bus all the way back until we were sian then we just started talking and some of us started sleeping. It was kind of sad to have the realization sink in that the trip was OVER ):

Yup reached Newton at 9 something, then we just went off la ):

QUOTABLE QUOTES!
“你给我一大跳!”
“I SCREWED UP!” *muffled scream*
“SPASTIC NUMBER ONE!”
“I’m going to listen to what he says and repeat it over and over again”
“JaMAica’s going to WEIN!”
“Eh I realized something! All the girls are from Raffles and all the guys are from ACS!” “EHH!”

and a last piece of advice: If you want to save your phone bill, DON’T get acquainted with the pizza guy (:

last words! THANKS TO ALL THE PEOPLE WHO MADE MY TRIP AN UNFORGETTABLE ONE! SUSAN CANDICE MABEL ZESLENE JERRYCA NICOLE SHAWN DARYL MARK GABRIEL SAMUEL ALEX NOT FORGETTING J&TSOH!

and of course, who can forget ROOMIE who, in contrast with the rest, made them seem so perfect. i shall proceed to give you a taste of her medicine (:
firstly, mark wants to testify that she is actually a MUTANT! CLASS 5! and her power, watch this, is to LOCATE THE MOUTH OF TRUTH, A TRUE TOURIST ATTRACTION. Mark, having had first hand experience has given http://psychedelia-.blogspot.com the full account

"eh Mark remember that mouth of truth thing u were talking about yesterday? today i found it leh! its near this shop with glass walls and manakins inside.. there are actually two u know.. one on each end of the level... "

spoken like a true mutant, i say (:

and she has the amazing power to piss people off as and when she wishes. Even EFFORTLESS, you know!
i mean, even when a little girl takes your things. you scold her? ok wait. it's perfectly alright to scold. i mean, just look at what i do to my sisters man. but perhaps, she could be a little more... consistent with her standards and don't only chide someone only a few times after that person's done it. that's like slapping your dog only a few times after it shits on your bed, you know!

not only that. the innate power to avoid starving without having to buy her own food. that is pure talent, sheer sheer cunningness, i tell you. and it happens not only once! first the jelly, which deeply traumatized poor mark, but alex's and shawn's food wasn't let off either! with the powers of sheer shamelessness complete with persuasive eyes, trust me, YOU'D BETTER TAKE CARE OF YOUR FOOD!

whoa, her skin is so thick that her powers are just like wolverine's, ONLY BETTER! HAHA! you see, wolverine can even heal bullet wounds! but HAHA ROOMIE IS SOMETHING BETTER! bullets will just BOUNCE OFF!

okay i shall cease to be mean already. heehee (:

<33 milo trip!

. huiwen ranted at 10:50 PM .